Would You Eat That?

As I think about the food that we humans eat, I often wonder who was the first person to try that particular item, and what on earth did they think it was?

For example, who first decided that they’d try opening up an oyster shell and slurping down the contents?

And how many people were violently ill or died while working out which mushrooms were safe to eat, and which weren’t? (They all look like “bad food” to me, but there again, I don’t like their taste or texture anyway.)

And what about shark? What was that first person thinking? Maybe they were after a bit of revenge, some “eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth” when a great white ate their brother?

Then there are the South American tribes that think tarantulas are a delicacy?

But let’s get back to less weird foods.

How did people first decide that killing some large animal would make a good food source?

Did they used to eat the meat raw, and how did this coincide with the discovery of fire?

Were humans once capable of eating raw meat anyway, or had the shape and structure of our teeth already changed from pure carnivore to omnivore?

How did early man equate fire with cooking, and who first thought, “I know, I’ll toss this bit of buffalo on the fire and see what happens?”

How did they even know which bits of the animal to eat?

And why are the so-called delicacies that are so expensive today so weird?

I mean, caviar? It’s fish eggs, and quite frankly, they look revolting and taste of salty water, above all else, in my experience.

We’ve already covered oysters, but what about lobsters and crabs?

What kind of dogged persistence and curiosity led us to get past the hard shells and the vicious-looking claws and decide to try eating these creatures?

The list of crazy foods just goes on and on, such as haggis, black pudding, fugu, octopus legs, snails, tripe, sweetmeats, brawn, sheep’s eyes, chicken feet, pig’s trotters, jellied eels, Kopi Luwak coffee, escamoles, and if you really want to be disgusted, do a search and find out what the Asian dish called Balut and the Sardinian cheese called casu marzu are.

And if you want something to wash these “delicacies” down with, how about some baby mouse wine?

Seriously, I’m not making this stuff up, honest!

Compared to some people, I probably have a very boring and restricted diet, but I can eat my food with confidence, knowing that it’s really dead and isn’t going to kill me in return.

Tags: oyster shell, jellied eels, dogged persistence, early man, south american tribes, first person

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