Chocolate Or Sex?
According to a survey conducted in 1995 by a popular women’s magazine, 70% of the women who responded said they would rather have chocolate than sex.
These figures were confirmed more recently in a poll by Cadbury – chocolate is apparently more essential for a happy life than sex. (Women also prefer chocolate to wine and designer cosmetics.)
And 20% of women (i.e. one in five) would go without sex before going without their chocolate.
(It’s probably these results that were the inspiration for Joan Sewell’s book, “I’d Rather Eat Chocolate: Learning to Love My Low Libido“.)
So, why do women prefer chocolate to sex?
Well, for starters, chocolate can’t get you pregnant, of course (although it can cause weight gain).
On the other hand, it can leave just as big a mess, and it’s equally hard to clean up.
On the plus side, I’m assured by those who know (don’t ask!) that the taste is considerably better (unless you enjoy eating salty chocolate).
Then, there’s the fact that you can more or less get pleasure from eating chocolate anywhere – without a risk of being arrested.
Maybe it’s easier to find a good chocolate bar than it is to find a satisfying man?
There again, a bar of chocolate won’t phone you the next day – but then most men don’t either, apparently.
With chocolate, there’s no need to spit it out because swallowing it is actually pleasurable.
And of course, we’d never had heard of Monica Lewinsky if she and Bill had only shared a bar of chocolate.
It’s a lot less gross to lick nuts if they’re in a bar of chocolate – and a lot less hairy too.
If you hold a bar of chocolate, it won’t go hard on you.
You can eat chocolate at your pace, and you can do it with your clothes on (or off).
Seriously though, what does this tell us about women (or about men and sex)?
And if this question seems a bit sexist, then research has shown that there are more female chocoholics than male ones.
One theory has it that chocolate raises serotonin levels, which are low in premenstrual women. (And it seems that women’s desire for chocolate does coincide with their monthly cycles.)
Is it, perhaps, the case that for most women, sex is not always their choice, but they agree to it for their men (either voluntarily or because they feel pressured)? Chocolate, on the other hand, is always their choice.
Or is it because it is a more complete experience? There’s the taste, the feel in the mouth, the smell, and for whatever reason, a sense of decadent luxury.
Is sex sometimes just too much like hard work?
Maybe eating chocolate is a more personal experience, a way to indulge yourself without having to worry about anybody else for a few minutes?
But whatever you might think about all of this, there is a kicker to this story.
According to Italian research (which was funded from a university research budget, and not by the chocolate industry), women who eat chocolate regularly have a better sex life than those who deny themselves this sensual treat.
So, there’s hope for us men yet! Just buy your lady some chocolates first, and then wait for her increased libido to kick in!
Tags: sex women, men and sex, low libido, weight gain, few minutesBELIEVE IT OR NOT:
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